Words of Advice for Military Brides

Home Sweet Home

Photo by Michelle E

Photo by Michelle E

Being a military bride is one of the toughest jobs in the world. Constantly worrying, wondering, and hoping for a safe return. I am currently going through the same experience that some of you may be going through as well. A Marine veteran told me that pain is weakness leaving the body. That every day will get better, love will get stronger and to remember that even though things get tough, you are each others strength. Not only that, but you are each others home. His home sweet home.

Previously, I had written an article about “How to Prepare When Your Fiance is Serving.” One of the best things to do when someone you love is away is to keep busy. It keeps your mind off things and helps the time fly by. If you’re looking for ideas on how to stay busy, then click here and check out one of our other helpful articles! Otherwise, this article is going to be about helping you mentally on this wild adventure.

Getting Through the Dark Times

There are going to be moments when he can’t talk to you for a long period of time. And believe me, it sucks. You might even have thoughts about your relationship and reconsider if maybe the military life isn’t right for you. I never thought that one day I would be head over heels for a Marine. I thought that after high school I would move out him, struggle through life and figure out how to adult together. We used to stay up all night and talk about our dreams. About finances, college and how we would study together in this coffee shop I always visit in my hometown. But things change, plans shift, and life keeps on moving whether you like it or not. It’s scary at times, realizing that while I’m figuring out life, he’s sacrificing his own to mold my future. During this journey, I have seen many couples break up because they have this mind set that they were abandoned. That they can’t handle being alone and don’t like the lack of communication. I’ll be honestly, at one point I had the same mindset. However, one thing that turned everything around was by taking a step into the past.

From Past to Present

Look back at all of your old photos, love letters, movie tickets and memories. Remember that the man who created all of those memories, loves you with all his heart. He didn’t leave to abandon you, or to make you feel alone. But to protect you and open up more opportunities to your future together. Before he left, him and I stood outside by my car and said our goodbyes. The sun was beaming and I could see the sadness in his eyes. During the time leading up, he never wanted to talk about the Marines. He wanted me to stay strong and know that he loves me. At first I was upset that he never wanted to talk. But then I realized that he was scared to. In that moment, the act went away. It was his passion to serve. But to live a dream means giving up something you love, but only for a little while. You see, you are his motivation, and what gets him through each and every day. Remember that him leaving wasn’t easy. It was probably the hardest thing he had ever had to do.

What to Think

The key to getting through this wild journey is keeping a positive mindset and attitude. For one, your fiance is a real life super hero. Sure, there are many fish in the sea, but doesn’t it feel good saying that your engaged to a man serving in the military? Another thing to think about is family. Every parent wants their child to date someone that can protect them, and you can’t get any higher up in the chain than an active military fiance.

Also, look at yourself. For you to be going through this is a huge step in life. Not only does is make your love stronger, but it makes you stronger as a women. You should be proud of your fiance, but also proud of yourself for staying so strong.

Family & Friends

There are going to be times when you feel lonely and depressed, so make sure to stay busy and surround yourself with family and friends. During the first week he left, I felt completely alone. I stayed at home, stayed up late and slept in when normally I am a early riser. But then I started to think about him, and realized that I wasn’t being strong. If I couldn’t be strong, then how could I make him proud? So I turned everything around. I started dressing up and going to the coffee house in town to work online every morning, made plans with his family and hung out with his niece and nephews. I started to clean every day and helped my mother out while she worked 3rd shift. I also started writing him lots of letters, taking pictures to send him and looking forward to the day he returns home.

Key to Success

The key to handling him being gone is you. You are the one that determines where the relationship goes and how it will end up. If you truly do love him and want this fairy tale to have a happy ending, then stay positive and know that this isn’t the end of the world. You’re going to get through this and no matter what, no matter how long it takes, his love for you isn’t going anywhere. As long as you keep showing him that there is a love to fight for, and a love to return home to.

“A Marine veteran told me that pain is weakness leaving the body. That every day will get better, love will get stronger and to remember that even though things get tough, you are each others strength. Not only that, but you are each others home. His home sweet home. ” Thank you for reading, and I am proud of you for being strong!

 

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